Sometimes when we look back over our shoulder, we catch a glimpse of the past streaming behind us, like a comet's tail. In that moment, we see the events of our lives with a clarity and perspective given only by the passage of time. Sifting through the multiple chapters of our life's experience, we can sum up the characters and events that have made us who we are, who we love, and why we love. We nod in relief at our wise decisions, and grieve our foolish ones. We can clearly see the impact of each decision,and the road taken as a result.
My road to La Leche league started with my sister Linda, who was told by our mother to "get the information, but for God's sake, don't join!" In an uncharacteristically rebellious manner (ha ha) Linda did indeed join,paving the way for the next five sisters.
Initially it was our introduction to mothering through breastfeeding. After that, they might as well have called the meetings "How to Empower Yourself and Become The Person You Were Meant To Be." Such was the effect of league on myself and my friends. My journey within this unique group of women took me past a fear of childbirth and into two empowered home births. In the year that I had my first vbac, every mother in our group except one was able to have a vaginal birth after a cesarean. Our leader, Dona, was a contributing factor in this. We learned about the power of good nutrition. Whole grains good; sugar bad. This was news to me! We learned to communicate more effectively with our children. "Hilary, the bed is not for jumping on," was a more effective statement than the more typical, "get the heck off the bed, you dumb kid, do you want to break your neck?" It sounds easy now, but believe me, a lot of work went into changing old parenting patterns. We learned how to stand up for ourselves and our children. I used to be such a fraidy cat. Its easy to surrender your values and ideals, and then complain later, but that kind of passive aggressive behavior leaves such a bad taste in the mouth. League taught me to stick up for myself, my children, and my beliefs.
I learned to trust my heart. When I had my first child, everyone had an opinion on how she should be raised. At La Leche League, I learned to listen to my baby and my own instincts. This led to the design of my first carrier, the babyTrekker, since attachment parenting is a concept highly promoted by league.
I finally got organized by being involved with La Leche League. Planning meetings, budgeting, and speaking in front of the group all prepared me for running my own business. I've made plenty of mistakes, and I'm not the world's most savvy business owner. But I'll tell you what. I'm a damned good mother. (Just ask my kids!) So thanks, La Leche League, and God bless all of you out there. Your mother to mother help meant more than you could ever know.
